straycatgal

i never thought that putting an end to one friendship would leave me feeling sort of friendless... well it did at first. I didnt want everyone feeling like they were in the middle so I just chose to back away altogether from everyone... Most people dont know my reasons or if they do they dont know everything... But here's a brief summary... it's a given that no one is perfect... we all make mistakes. As a friend I try my best to just suck up the mistakes that my friends make and stand by them no matter what (as i;m sure the do that for me as well). Even if it makes me look bad to a stranger. I had a friend who wouldnt seem to learn from her mistakes. It got to the point where it affected me. Because of her actions I lost my relationship. She had told me she would calm down with her drinking but I learned that no later than the next weekend she was back at it again. I dont think there is anything wrong with getting drunk... I mean i have my days where it'll happen to me...but when your drinking starts affecting others maybe you should tone it down a bit. I did tell her that she needed to calm down but no... So I tried just letting my relationship go thinking that she would be there as a friend and help me get through this. Turns out I was wrong again. She chose to live her life without even caring to ask how things were going with me or anything. And thats another mistake shes made before, shes had close friends who she fucks off when shes in a relationship. I was hurt and angry at her for a while...I felt that I was there for her as a friend for so long and she couldnt be there for me at all. Thats where I decided that I couldnt be in a one way friendship with her. Being her friend cost me someone that was really important to me. I hope that she gets it one day. I hope that she grows up a bit and then we can be friends. I know she has the potential of being a great friend, but the timing was just wrong for us. There was only so much I could take. I'm slowly trying to reach out to the other friends who i backed away from... Im doing it slowly because i dont want them to be caught in the middle since this is still somewhat fresh. I know eventually we'll all be friends but for the time being I just need my own space from her.